The many faces of Bowen

This is a grouping of some of my favorite Bowen poses. Everything from his bottom lip sticking out to his dimples to his little bum up in the air while he sleeps. These are from the last 2 months (August and September). He is now rolling over from his tummy to his back and then from his back to his tummy repeatedly after doing it once just a couple of days ago. We also started him on brown rice cereal yesterday. He's had it 3 times now and improves immensely with each feeding. I'm constantly amazed at how babies learn and retain so quickly. He is suddenly growing up so fast and as much as I love it, I can understand why it's so important to cherish every minute because it really does fly by.

Bowen Reid Adair

It's been so long since I've posted something that I almost don't know where to start. But I think I will finally blog about Bowen since he's now 3 months old. Better late than never!

Bowen Reid Adair arrived 9 nine days early on May 21st at 3:12 p.m. This also happened to be grandma Anderson's birthday! Well, he had to do SOMETHING to be the favorite grandchild since there are 6 other darling cousins who have preceded him :). I had visited the hospital the night before because I'd had a nagging headache for over 16 hours and finally decided that I had better rule out pregnancy induced hypertension (PIH). Well, my blood pressure was higher than normal, but it eventually came down on its own after a couple of hours of being on the monitor with zero intervention. I was only dilated to a 2 and my labs were normal so they sent me home. 6 hours later my water broke. Like an idiot, I figured I could sleep in and had been playing Scrabble on my kindle until 2:30 a.m. My water broke at 4:45 a.m. You do the math. I was one tired chica. I even went back to bed in my stupor thinking, "I have 24 hours until I get an infection, I can sleep for a little bit longer." But when I laid down again, my water continued to trickle out making sleep impossible. So I went into the next room to get Marty up (we were sleeping in separate rooms due to my tremendous pregnancy induced snoring problem) and told him that we were going to have a baby today. Pretty exciting. I called my doctor and then we got ready to go to the hospital. I was really calm and we checked in at 7:00 a.m. It was about then that the contractions really started kicking in and I was anxious to get my epidural. I was dilated to a 4 upon admission so I was able to get it. The epidural was in by 9:15 so they started the pitocin at that time as well. The timing would have been perfect had the epidural worked right away. But it took 45 long minutes of pain before the medicine finally kicked in. I was pretty emotional during that time because not only was I in pain, but I began to worry that it wasn't going to work at all and I was a little anxious. But when it did, I was in heaven and was even able to sleep a bit until I had dilated to a 10 and was ready to start pushing at around 1:30 p.m. I couldn't feel anything so pushing was strange. But I pushed with all my might and even burst 3 blood vessels in my eyes. My right eye had become so swollen that I couldn't see out of it. After 1 1/2 hours of pushing, I was given a choice. I was afraid that one of the options would be a C-section because I could feel the tension in the room and knew that Bowen was in distress. His heart rate would dip after each contraction so time was beginning to be of the essence. But my options were these: rest for awhile and then try to push again or use forceps to assist Bowen out. I asked Dr. Lunt how long I would have to push again if I chose that option. He said 45 minutes at least. The downside of the forceps was there would be trauma to the birth canal and there's always a risk for the baby. But I didn't have it in me to push anymore and knew Bowen needed to come out sooner rather than later. So they got the NICU team to come be on standby just in case and then with the next push, Bowen was out! It was incredible and I was overwhelmed with emotion realizing that after 37 years of waiting, I was finally a mother. Marty did great the whole time. He was trying to take pictures and video while also cutting the cord and trying to be there with Bowen while they got him measured and cleaned off. I was exhausted, but so ready to see and hold my baby. It took Dr. Lunt 45 minutes to sew me back together because I tore in all directions. But it was all worth it.

My nurses were fabulous. Shar was my main nurse and she reassured me that I had made the right decision to use the forceps because "Bowen wasn't going to come out otherwise." Turns out the cord was pinched inside somehow and my pelvis was 'marginal' according to Dr. Lunt. Plus, my uterus wasn't contracting hard enough on its own and I needed the pitocin the entire labor period even after I was dilated to a 10. So I was glad to be in a place where I had very competent medical care to deliver my sweet son. Bowen was only 5 lbs 13 oz and 18 inches long.

We were discharged 2 days later and Bowen weighed 5 lbs 8 oz. The lactation nurse noticed that he was tongue tied and suggested we get him clipped to improve latching on. 2 days later we did go to the pediatrician's office to get it taken care of and Bowen's weight had now fallen to 5 lbs 4 oz. My milk had just come in the night before but he was still not great at nursing. The pediatrician said I needed to pump and feed him through a bottle or start supplementing with formula. I pumped AND nursed AND fed him through a bottle at every feeding. It was extremely time consuming. But I didn't want to do formula if I could help it. We went back to the office again 2 days after he got his tongue clipped to get him circumcised. When we weighed him this time, he had gained 3 oz. He was now 5 lbs 7 oz and I was feeling more at peace. I tried to remain calm and collected during that first week in spite of Bowen's fluctuating weight and did pretty good. But it was a huge relief to see him start to trend in the right direction.

At 2 1/2 months he weighed 10 lbs 15 oz and was 22 1/2 inches long! He is a joy and we are more in love with him every day. He smiles all of the time and loves to look at his octupus on his mobile. He is now 3 months old and changing constantly. Lately he started grabbing things on his mobile and loves to squish a blanket into his face over and over again. He rolled over a couple of times one night from his belly to his back, but hasn't been interested in doing it again. He had developed an umbilical hernia at about 3 weeks old that stuck up about an inch. With all of my research, I discovered that it should repair itself by age 5. I didn't want it take that long! But I was glad it was fairly common and it didn't alarm his doctor (or me once I had read about it). However, it has already started to repair and is getting smaller all the time. Happy day!

Another thing unique to Bowen is his Thumper foot (it's like the lower lip quiver, but in his legs). He also LOVES to arch his back and look at the world upside down. Bowen gets entranced by lights and ceiling fans or sometimes nothing at all. He could stare at a blank wall for minutes at a time. I like to think he's looking at his angel friends he recently left in heaven. He is finally taking day naps for longer than 20 minutes (which is why I can finally blog again) and sleeps at least 6 hours a night. Though a couple of nights ago he slept for 9 hours straight! That was nice. He is the cleanest baby I've ever met. He never drools and rarely spits up. His blowouts are a thing of the past now that I have the right-sized diaper on him. But I wasn't going to waste the small diapers - too expensive! As far as nursing goes, we don't. For my sanity and his I just pump every few hours and he is breastfed via a bottle. I supplement with formula, but he usually only needs 1-2 bottles of formula in a 24 hour period. He never did latch on very well even after his tongue got clipped. But we are happy with this situation and this way I can wear normal clothes and Marty can easily help feed him. Bowen LOVES his carseat and so traveling has been easy which is nice because we've already taken him to Las Vegas and to Salem twice.

Bowen was blessed on July 3rd and ALL of my family minus Jaron (you were sorely missed) were here for the occasion. Which is a miracle because they are literally spread all over the world. It meant a lot to us to have you all here. Marty's family was mostly there as well. Even Brook and Joe came up from Arizona. Bowen is really lucky to have such a great family on both sides :).

And Marty and I are lucky and blessed to have little Bowen. It really is amazing how much love you can have for another person you just met. I still look at him in awe sometimes and can't believe he's all mine. Marty feels the same way. We are so excited to be his parents and scared to death at the same time. We already talk about how old he should be to have a cell phone and how he needs to date. It's a different world than the one we grew up in. But we are up for the challenge and I absolutely love being a mom.

Thursday, March 31, 2011

Miracles

I don't have an exciting picture to go with this post so forgive me. But I still feel like I need to catch up on what happened with my Bountiful home. In my last posting, I wrote about coming to terms with foreclosing and being okay with the ramifications of that decision. Then in February, we got an offer for 290k which was far above anything we had hoped for. We felt like it was a great offer, only 17k less than what we owed. But with realtor's fees and closing costs, we would still be 30k in the hole. I went ahead and signed the papers accepting the offer, but didn't know if we could really go through with it. Marty and I decided at first to accept the offer and make payments to the bank for the difference, wanting to do the right thing. But there was still a rock in my stomach because after doing the math, it could take us up to 25 years to pay that debt off with what we could afford and we wouldn't even be owning the thing we were paying off! Plus, that money could be put towards Bowen's mission and college fund. Then after I talked to my brother, Devon, about it he really made me feel like I shouldn't pay it. I asked him if he would please call my bank (Weber State Credit Union) and try to negotiate something with them. He deals with banks for a living and understands the laws and how banks operate much better than the average person - including our realtor. He agreed to do that and finally got in touch with someone there who could actually make decisions, the VP of loan services. He discussed my case with him at length and over several days. Apparently, since credit unions are non profit, they are required to sue me for the deficiency on the loan. I had considered bankruptcy, but only if forced into it. Them suing me would do that. But statistically, they know that the odds of recovering any money in these kinds of situations are next to zero. So Devon talked numbers with him and convinced him that their best option was to settle with me now instead of paying filing fees and lawyers to chase me down for years knowing I'm not going to be able to pay them anything. In the end, they agreed to take $5,500 and consider the loan paid and clean up my credit where they could since I had stopped making my payment in December. We agreed on the settlement the day before I was supposed to close on the house, which was March 10th. Ironically, Marty signed closing documents for our lot and construction loan in St. George on March 9th. It was a busy week. While I was signing closing documents on the 10th, he was traveling up to Bountiful to move the rest of our stuff out. The buyer's were literally moving in on top of him on the 11th, but Marty said they were nice about it and even helped him and Travis (Marty's brother). My dad helped out as well. I had to work so was unable to make the trip. It was a wild weekend but it was so amazing to have it all happen at the same time. For me, this was an absolute blessing because now we didn't have to worry about me filing for bankruptcy or being haunted by this for years down the road. Devon saved us a lot of headache, anxiety and money by working with my bank and I'm very grateful to him for his work.

This experience has been a true miracle in my life. My testimony has been strengthened as I was reminded of how aware God is of my concerns and fears. He knows what outcome is best if I just have faith in Him and remember that always.

Friday, January 14, 2011

Baby Bowen

Sheesh! Where do I start? It's only been 3 months since my last posting, but our lives have changed dramatically. My intention was to blog about our pregnancy as soon as we went to our first doctor visit on November 2nd. I was 10 weeks along then and had an ultrasound picture of our tiny baby! But we traveled to New Harmony that very afternoon and my computer didn't come with me on that trip. Neither did my camera or anything else that would have been helpful for me to blog. So now at 21 weeks I am finally getting around to announcing on my blog that we are pregnant! And it's a boy! And his name is Bowen Reid Adair. And he's adorable as you can tell by his pictures.

My pregnancy has gone fairly well. I thought I had a 'bug' for weeks at the beginning of my pregnancy because the nausea that I was supposed to have wasn't anything like I had expected. I just didn't have an appetite and when I did, it was only for unhealthy foods. I craved white bread and greasy Mexican food. No fruits or vegetables or whole grain for me. No sugar, either, which was one plus. That feeling lasted for exactly 3 months. Then it was replaced by heartburn. I have finally found a cure for it, only to find that my insurance won't pay for it. So after this prescription runs out, I have to switch to something else, which better work! Indigestion has also been my constant companion since the beginning. I won't go into details, but I'm disgusting. That's all you need to know, if that. But none of these symptoms kept me from doing what I've needed to do. I have been able to work, work out (though my intensity has had to be cut back), and do every day things. So I consider myself lucky. I don't enjoy the fatness, though. I'm still in that in between stage where nothing I've had fits well, it just looks like I'm outgrowing my clothes. And I'm not popping out enough for cute maternity clothes. Blah! But in the last week I have been able to feel Bowen moving around and that makes it all worth it. There really is somebody in there!

Like I said earlier, we traveled to New Harmony in November. Well, we actually MOVED here that day. This move has changed everything I have ever known about my life, except for Marty. I started a new job, basically quit my old one, suddenly had way too much time on my hands, and was living with my in-laws (who are wonderful), but it just wasn't "my home and my things" anymore. I am also in a new place where I don't know my way around (Cedar City or St. George). It has been challenging for me to figure out what to do with my time since New Harmony is not really close to shopping of any kind and I don't have any 'projects' to do like I did in my home. I also had a new job that though it requires me to only work one day a week, it was still very different from anything I've ever done. I'm a nursing clinical instructor for Mohave Community College. They are located in Arizona with four campuses. One of which is in Colorado City where our students go for classroom learning. Then they go to St. George for clinicals. So I'm in St. George with them at Dixie Regional Medical Center. At first it was intimidating for me, but I have grown to love the students and their eagerness to learn. And I am gaining confidence that yes, after 10 years of working as an RN, I do have some things that I have learned that I can in turn teach to the next generation of nurses.

Marty is still working for the University of Phoenix as an advisor and really enjoys it. He started his doctorate program last week which will take 3 years. I'm very proud of him. He hopes to start teaching online classes later this year.

Our beautiful home in Bountiful has been a stress for us. We have continued to pay on it, though we aren't living there. It has been on the market for 7 months now. Our price has come down 100k in that time. But the reality of it is, according to the bank, we will owe the deficit to the bank regardless of whether we sell it for less than what we owe, do a short sale (which they will not do), or foreclose. Unless I file for bankruptcy. Only my name is on the home, thank goodness. So we have increased our price again closer to what we owe, but I'm not hopeful it will sell for what we need. So the future of that house is still undetermined. At the advice of trusted and knowledgeable friends, family and people in the biz, we have been upfront with the bank and told them that we have made our last payment. They understand and we will see what happens in the next few months. I hate to see all of our work just go back to the bank, but that is the reality I'm facing now and after many tears and 'moments', I'm okay with that. We are one of the many victims of this economy and it is what it is.

We are going to rent an apartment in St. George soon so that we can both be closer to work and figure out where we are going to either buy or build a home. We have much to be grateful for.

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